GOOD VIBES STUDIO

If you are waiting for a sign to tell you that YOU DO NOT HAVE TO DO ANYTHING THAT MAKES YOU MISERABLE, this is it.

Last week I visited Los Angeles, California for the first time and needless to say, I caught the bug. You know the one… the Golden Vibes lust. It all started when I hiked up one of the Griffith Park trails and watched the sunset from a mountain top. As I looked out onto the horizon, I lost my breath over and over. I closed my eyes, took a deep inhale, then an exhale, and felt my heart ease into a calm pitter patter. I felt whole–in a place I had never been before. As the week progressed my soul persisted in the same resounding fashion.

And then I came home.

I’m sure everyone can relate to the post vacation low vibes, especially after the holidays, but this time was different. It was as if I left a part of me someplace else–the most authentic, truest, liveliest part of myself. How could that be? I thought. I live in Miami, the East Coast paradise, why am I all bent out of shape? So I did what I always do when I can’t figure something out… I called my best friend.

After a few whatcha up to’s and how’s it goin’s we began to uncover what lied beneath the surface. I told her that since I returned home, things haven’t been the same. “I found my calling” I said, “but now it pains me to do anything else except work towards my dream.”

Let me explain…

I work in Sales and I am so blessed to work for such an outstanding company. Our mission is to grow local businesses through software integration and digital marketing. The pay is tremendous, the benefits are unmatched, the hours are flexible–for some, this job is the jackpot. Though after the glitz and glamour of being able to pay my bills, my student loans, save and still have spending money died off–I realized that this job simply isn’t for me. And it has very little to do with the job itself, and everything to do with the fact that is not my passion.

My entire life I have been a source of positivity for all who know me. I am an example of inspiration, determination, leadership, courage, perseverance, love, kindness, compassion and joy for others. I am committed to having a life-changing impact on the lives of my friends, my family, my community and the world at large. I am the spark that ignites peoples passions. I am the voice of compassion and light that resonates through the hearts and minds of all whom I’m surrounded by. This is who I am.

Just recently I realized I can turn this passion into a living.  My dream is to become a life coach, a yoga teacher and an author. To one day open up a physical “Good Vibes Studio” where people can come to, well, catch a good vibe. All of which can be achieved with just a little bit of knowledge, and a little motivation.

My voice cracked as I spoke to my best friend from the truest depths of my soul. “My heart’s just not in it anymore,” I explained, “And every day that I’m forced to do something my heart’s not in, I’m breaking down.”

Here’s a summary of her response:

Your 20’s are for RULING THINGS OUT. So what if you quit? Sure the responsible thing to do is to find a backup before you up and go but SO WHAT? You need to take back agency of your own life. (At this point I’m crying) This makes me think of the quote by Marianne Williamson: “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.” It seems to me that you have always known that you wanted to help people…now you’re just finally ready to do it. (SOBBING, now I’m SOBBING) You know what my dad said to me when I wanted to quit my job a few years back? He said, WHY ARE YOU DROWNING YOURSELF AT 23? If something is making you this unhappy then leave it behind. Your job is making you miserable so let it go. You aren’t letting anyone down by quitting, it doesn’t have to be a negative thing, you are just actively choosing to move in the direction of your dreams and not be held back by something that is fracturing your spirit.

*Wiping tears*

*Still wiping tears*

I wasn’t crying because she was saying something I didn’t already know. I was crying because she validated my feelings. Everyone I had spoken to prior thought I was insane. “You have an incredible job,” “You’re lucky to be employed,” “You’re making more money than all of us.” I convinced myself it was wrong to feel this way. I wanted to punch myself in the face for not being grateful for the job I have. “Why are you being such a baby?” I would tell myself, “Just go to work and make it happen and shut the fuck about it.” “You have to work for your dreams.” “You have to save up enough money so you can live the life you want to live.” And every time I spoke those words a piece of my soul shriveled. I knew I wasn’t living my truth and it was breaking me down.

So when my best friend said “JUST QUIT,” her words reverberated through me. All of my negative thoughts shattered.

“You’re right,” I said.

Whether I end up leaving my job, tomorrow, a week, or 3 months from now–it’s not the point. The fact is, I had convinced myself that I was trapped. That my only option was to keep trudging through. I remembered once again that I am in charge of my own life and if something is making me unhappy I have the choice to leave it behind. Sometimes all you need is a shift in perspective. This is the time in our lives to try new things. Most of us don’t yet have husbands/wives or children or mortgages or PTA meetings to attend. Your 20’s are the most important years to travel, to learn, and to rule out all the shit you don’t like to do, so you can discover what it is that you are meant to do. Of course you have to do something to pay the bills and put food on the table–but you are not married to any particular job. Especially not in your 20’s. Remember that by letting go of each experience, we make room for the next. So just in case you don’t have a best friend to remind you: YOUR FEELINGS ARE VALID, HAPPINESS IS A CHOICE, AND YOU ARE NOT CRAZY FOR WANTING TO FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS. I repeat: YOU ARE NOT CRAZY FOR WANTING TO FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS.

On the contrary, the world could use more dreamers.

Sending love and light to all,

Nina 💜